🎄❌ Festivus — December 23 - A holiday for the rest of us… and by “us,” I mean people who are tired.
Welcome to Festivus, the unofficial, unapologetic anti-holiday holiday that shows up every December 23 to lovingly roast seasonal chaos. There are no twinkling lights. No elaborate decor. No forced cheer. Just an aluminum pole, a lot of opinions, and the comforting knowledge that you are not required to be merry.
If traditional holidays feel like too much pressure and not enough honesty, congratulations—you’ve found your people.
💁♀️ Affiliate Disclosure
Some links below may earn me a small commission, which I will use to buy…absolutely nothing festive. Possibly snacks. Definitely snacks.
📜 The Very Real (and Slightly Petty) Origins
Festivus was introduced to the world in a 1997 episode of Seinfeld, thanks to Frank Costanza, a man who truly believed holidays should come with fewer expectations and more yelling.
What started as a fictional family tradition quickly became a real-life cultural phenomenon for anyone who thought, “Yes. This. This feels right.” Festivus rejects commercialism, embraces honesty, and celebrates the idea that perfection is overrated.
Its pillars?
The Airing of Grievances
Feats of Strength
A plain aluminum pole
Zero tinsel, zero nonsense
📌 Festivus Fun Facts
The aluminum pole was chosen for its “high strength-to-weight ratio.”
Festivus has no official food…which is extremely on-brand.
The holiday has been celebrated worldwide, mostly ironically—but also sincerely.
It’s one of the only holidays where complaining is encouraged.
Festivus pairs beautifully with sarcasm and leftovers.
There are no cards, no gifts, and no guilt.
🎉 11 Perfectly On-Brand Ways to Celebrate
Put up an aluminum pole. Nothing else.
Host an Airing of Grievances (set a timer).
Serve whatever dinner requires the least effort.
Wear gray. Or black. Or “meh.”
Print Festivus rules and post them dramatically.
Skip decorations entirely and call it minimalist.
Invite friends who enjoy complaining creatively.
Replace holiday music with silence.
End the night with Feats of Strength (arm wrestling optional).
Celebrate virtually by sharing grievances via group chat.
Go to bed early. Truly the Festivus dream.
🍽️ Festivus Dinner Menu
Low effort. High satisfaction.
🥩 Entrée: Meatloaf (or Plant-Based Equivalent)
Classic, no-frills, deeply nostalgic.
🥔 Side: Mashed Potatoes
Butter. Salt. No garnish. We’re not here to impress.
🍸 Cocktail: The Grievance Gimlet
Vodka, lime juice, and a suspicious amount of ice.
🥤 Mocktail: Bitter Lemon Spritz
Sparkling water + lemon + a dash of tonic bitterness.
🍰 Dessert: Store-Bought Cake
Because effort is optional today.
🏫 Classroom Activities
Elementary:
Create a “no-frills” paper pole
Write silly grievances (teacher-approved)
Discuss fictional holidays
Secondary:
Satire and pop culture analysis
Create modern parody holidays
Debate: Is Festivus necessary for society?
🧑💼 Workplace Festivus Idea
Host a Lighthearted Grievance Board where employees anonymously submit workplace pet peeves—strictly humorous, strictly optional, and promptly removed by HR the next day.
🎬 Movie Pick - Anything that isn’t a holiday movie
Because Festivus refuses to be emotionally manipulated.
📺 TV Episode Pick - Seinfeld – “The Strike”
The original Festivus episode. Required viewing. Non-negotiable.
#️⃣ Hashtags
#Festivus #HolidayForTheRestOfUs #AiringOfGrievances
#December23 #AntiHoliday #FestiveButNotReally
#MinimalistCelebration #SeinfeldHoliday
