🌮 10 Taco Toppings That Should Be Illegal (But Somehow Aren’t)

(A very real list of questionable choices that people have actually tried — and sometimes even defended.)

1. Ketchup 🍅🚫
   A bold move. A bad move. Tacos don’t need the sweet, tomato-syrup energy of a backyard burger condiment.

2. American Cheese Slices 🧀
   Not shredded. Not melted. Just folded like laundry and tucked into the taco like it pays rent there. Crimes against queso.

3. Iceberg Lettuce (Shredded Beyond Recognition) 🥬
   This isn't illegal, but it should be—because it’s all crunch, no flavor, and somehow always soggy five minutes later.

4. Canned Corn 🌽
   We love corn. But the straight-from-the-can variety often brings a weird sweetness and a puddle of metallic juice with it. Tacos deserve better.

5. Plain Greek Yogurt (as “healthy sour cream”) 🥄
   Yes, we know it has protein. No, that doesn't make it taste like sour cream. The tang is all wrong. Respect the crema.

6. Sriracha 🌶️
   Delicious on many things—but on tacos, it often bulldozes every other flavor like a spicy wrecking ball. Calm down, rooster sauce.

7. Black Olives 🫒
   This one divides families. They show up uninvited, like that one cousin who never brings anything to the potluck but leaves with leftovers.

8. Raw Broccoli 🥦
   We’ve seen it. We’re not happy about it. It’s crunchy, confusing, and belongs in a salad—not on your carnitas.

9. Store-Bought Ranch Dressing 🍼
   A drizzle here, a dollop there—and suddenly your taco thinks it’s at a Midwestern potluck. Ranch, stay in your lane.

10. Hard-Boiled Egg Slices 🥚
    Yes, protein. Yes, texture. But when your taco starts tasting like a Cobb salad, something’s gone off the rails.

💡 Honorable Mentions from the Taco Twilight Zone:

• Pineapple (controversial, but we see you al pastor fans)

• Baked beans (soupy and slidey)

• Fried onion rings (delicious, but confusing)

• Jalapeño-flavored Cheetos (crunchy chaos)

• Cold rotisserie chicken (just... warm it up, please)

👀 The Bottom Line:
Tacos are sacred. They deserve thoughtful toppings, not pantry panic. Let’s save the odd combos for grilled cheese and focus on keeping tacos crispy, zesty, and not full of ketchup.